it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
