Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Come on in and take your pants off
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