Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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