so explain again why im purple
no
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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