He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
