the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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