From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
