You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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