Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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