Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We have so much sex to catch up on
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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