Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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