This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
