I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
They took my balls.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
