it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
