You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I'm both gender and math confused
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
