Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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