we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
