problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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