Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
i believe in u and ur pee
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
