We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
