He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize