"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize