You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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