She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Randomize