Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
