At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize