please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
