Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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