my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
