please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
