The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
