How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
My hand turned me down
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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