He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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