Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
