Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
