My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
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