I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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