Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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