i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
