they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
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