Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
