Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
