This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
