Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
