my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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