And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
