I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
This house was built for laser tag.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
