Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
