She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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