I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
me + whiskey = a bad person
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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